We grow up thinking to be “good moms,” we have to be perfect.

But it’s impossible to be perfect because no one is, so we become plagued with mental health issues in the process.

We battle ourselves and our children because we aren't enough, and neither are they.

We’re angry and snappy. We yell when they’re loud, when they act “crazy,” and when they don’t eat their vegetables.

We yell because their poor behavior means we’re failing them.

But here’s the secret: all we need to be is the kind mom. And striving to be the perfect mom isn’t going to get us there.

All types of moms can be kind, too: The Quiet Mom, The Loud Mom, The Martyr Mom, The By-the-Book Mom. And kindness doesn’t mean being a pushover. It means thinking about our words and actions and being considerate of others.

It means modeling kind behavior.

Because our children need to hear us say kind words to ourselves and others.

They need to hear us make polite chitchat with the cashier at the grocery store and say thank you as he hands us the change.

They need to see us open doors and give an extra hand.

They need to see us comfort a crying friend.

We need to step in and teach them inclusion when we see them leaving another kid out.

We need to take them with us to bring food over to a sick neighbor.

And it doesn’t mean being kind all the time.

Because we’re going to have bad days where we find ourselves yelling.

But on those bad days, we need to explain that kindness isn't easy every day, so today, we will do our best, and if we’re grumpy toward them, it's not their fault.

Because even on our worst days, we're striving to be kind.

Because the goal is to raise kind humans.

Life will beat our kids up enough when they leave the house that we should want to build them up as much as possible. We want them to be confident in our love and their worth…

…and be kind.

And if they are, well, we're great moms.