You don’t get to belittle anyone else’s hard. 

You don't get to say that her being bullied in high school was a long time ago, and she should “just get over it already.” 

You don’t get to say that her losing a baby at five weeks isn’t hard because she didn’t even hear the heartbeat.

You don’t get to say that he should move on from the death of his dog because it's “only a dog.”

You don’t get to say to someone recently divorced that they need to start seeing other people and moving on because “he’s moving on.”

You don’t have a right to interject your opinion in someone’s hard. 

We know them as pain dismissers, and they are the worst of the worst. 

The ones who roll their eyes and say, get over it or come on, you're lucky. Or worse, OTHER PEOPLE HAVE IT WORSE. Like you weren’t aware.

They tell you about so-and-so and how that person had it even worse than you and is doing so great. Oh, and maybe they can connect the two of you. 

Vomit.  

They imply that your pain is just an excuse to throw a pity party. 

They make you feel guilty for experiencing pain. 

They make you feel like your pain doesn’t matter.

But they’re wrong. 

Everyone's pain is different, and no one can know how deeply someone feels unless they’re in their body feeling all their feelings. 

So, no one should judge or assume anything about what they can’t feel or understand. 

You’re allowed to hurt. 

You’re allowed to feel tightness in your chest when the subject comes up. 

You’re allowed to take as much time as you need to heal. 
Because your experience matters.

You matter.